Saturday, November 27, 2010

JOANNA & ME


A few weeks ago, I was asked to submit some questions for Joanna Newsom to Uncut Magazine. This was because, for some reason, Uncut was doing an article about her. I was elated to get the opportunity to ask Joanna a couple things that were weighing on my mind, so I scribbled my questions on the back of a cigarette pack with a coke spoon and mailed them to Uncut World HQ. Now, something tells me they probably won't run my questions (see below) so I thought I'd post them here!

Anyway, the following questions were what I sent to Uncut and to Joanna Newsom's publicist as well.

MY LETTER TO UNCUT:

So ok, here are my quick questions for Joanna off the top of my head. I am of course a fan of hers, having first heard her spellbinding tune "Sprout and the Bean" in the Oscar-winning slasher flick The Strangers. So here are my questions:

1. If you lost all your fingers, and your head got cut off, would you continue to play music somehow?

2. When are you going to sell your harp? Because I need some firewood, lady. I can offer twenty dollars... and the clock's ticking.

3. Who's better in bed? Will Oldham, Devendra Banhart, Andy Samberg, or your harp?

4. Do you ever wonder why The Beatles didn't have a harpist?

So that's it for now, but I'm sure I could come up with more questions for her if you need them. Best wishes, Charles


DISCLAIMER: Joanna and I dated for several years in the 1990's (in my head)